Culture

Stop Telling Me to Smile

June 6, 2017

author:

Stop Telling Me to Smile

We do a lot of communicating with our mouth, & and we’re not just talking about the words that come out of it.

Smiling is an important tool that we use to demonstrate when we feel good about who or what we’re looking at or experening; we also utilize the smile as a tool to encourage other people to like us. When we look at the use of the smile in our relatives the chimpanzees, it is used as a way to express submission. A smile looks quite different than a snarl or a growl and it makes certain that a chimps “resting bitch face”(if you will) isn’t misread as an act of aggression. Many researchers believe we are very smilier when it comes to facial expressions.  Both humans and chimps have a fear-specific smile that’s rectangular in shape and used when we are scared or anxious but trying to get out of harm’s way. There is also an emoji that has this rectangular, toothy smile which is employed frequently along with “whoops” or “awkward” type texts.

If you’re one of those people who has a hard time stifling a laugh when something goes wrong, know that you’re not alone. You probably don’t actually think it’s funny when someone falls, but you body responds in that way because it’s trying to release endorphins to cut down on the pain you’re perceiving. Sensitive people are even more likely to respond in that way so they don’t feel too bad about witnessing someone else getting hurt.

It’s pretty easy to see how smiling can be helpful when you’re trying to be charming, but smiling being a submission signal could be why women tend to get so irritated when demanded to smile (apart from the fact that it’s just beyond annoying). When there’s no natural inclination to smile it can be pretty insulting to be asked to do it for a stranger, especially since those conversations are often in flirty settings (men are actually more likely to read a smile as flirtation than women are).

smile - psychnsex

 

Besides the fact that it’s weird to demand that people smile for no reason, it won’t always give the expected result that the person is looking for.

There are tons of muscles in the face that play a part in that sort of communication and most people are pretty good at spotting fake smiles. Fake smiles use slightly different facial muscles than real smiles do, and frequently those differences are noticeable around the eyes. For one thing, the obicularis occuli contracts around the eyes when we have a genuine smile, and it’s harder to fake that than moving other muscles at our will. Fake smiles also tend to pop on and off the face faster than genuine smiles do, which are more likely to linger when the actual emotion of happiness is being felt.

This is exactly why some people’s smiles turn you off or make you distrustful of their motives in a conversation. Why are you really talking to me if you feel the need to fake a smile? Why are you seeking my approval in a manner that can be seen as manipulative or disingenuous? It can be a little jarring, especially if you’re especially perceptive. A forced smile is often just simply suspicious, and it can be just as visible in photos as it is in person. When people never quit with the inauthentic smile it can actually make you think that they’re close to snapping. They might be.

Real Vs Fake

Authentic smiles, on the other hand, are pretty efficient at both making the smiling person seem more attractive and also making the recipient feel better for having the smile directed at them. When we view a smile that’s pointed in our direction it activates the orbitofrontal cortex of the brain and actually makes us feel rewarded. That’s exactly why we tend to be attracted to be people who are friendly and direct with their attention, whether or not their intention is actually to flirt or not.

Simply put, authentic smiles are powerful connecting tools whether they’re inspired by love or downright terror. But fake smiles of any kind can actually project the opposite of what they intend to.

smile - psychnsex

 

 

Hart, Joshua, and Rhea M. Howard. “I Want Her to Want Me: Sexual Misperception as a Function of Heterosexual Men’s Romantic Attachment Style.” Personality and Individual Differences 92 (2016): 97-103. Web.

Wang, Ze, Huifang Mao, Yexin Jessica Li, and Fan Liu. “Smile Big or Not? Effects of Smile Intensity on Perceptions of Warmth and Competence.” Journal of Consumer Research. Oxford University Press, 29 Oct. 2016. Web. 18 May 2017.

Ambadar, Zara, Jeffrey F. Cohn, and Lawrence Ian Reed. “All Smiles Are Not Created Equal: Morphology and Timing of Smiles Perceived as Amused, Polite, and Embarrassed/Nervous.” Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. U.S. National Library of Medicine, 01 Mar. 2009. Web. 18 May 2017.

Primitive emotional contagion. Hatfield, Elaine; Cacioppo, John T.; Rapson, Richard L. Clark, Margaret S. (Ed), (1992). Emotion and social behavior. Review of personality and social psychology, Vol. 14., (pp. 151-177). Thousand Oaks, CA, US: Sage Publications, Inc, xi, 311 pp.

 

31 Comments
  1. […] raunchy ain’t for everyone, in fact, some of us a pretty terrible at it; also, some of us don’t love being called names and learning new slang for genitalia we never wanted in our vocabularies. Guess what, there’s […]

  2. matelas gonflable classement

    I write a leave a response whenever I especially enjoy a article on a website or I have something to valuable to contribute to the conversation. Usually it's caused by the passion communicated in the post I read. And on this post Stop Telling Me to Smile • Psych N Sex. I was actually excited enough to drop a thought ;-) I actually do have 2 questions for you if you usually do not mind. Is it only me or do a few of the comments appear as if they are written by brain dead visitors? :-P And, if you are posting at additional sites, I'd like to follow you. Could you make a list all of all your communal pages like your linkedin profile, Facebook page or twitter feed?

  3. Jacelyn

    Hello everyone, it's my first pay a visit at this site, and piece of writing is truly fruitful in support of me, keep up posting these articles or reviews.

  4. Hack a Phone

    What i do not understood is if truth be told how you're not really a lot more neatly-appreciated than you might be right now. You are very intelligent. You recognize thus significantly in the case of this topic, produced me individually believe it from numerous varied angles. Its like women and men aren't fascinated except it is one thing to accomplish with Lady gaga! Your own stuffs nice. At all times maintain it up!

  5. Your post captures the issue perfectly!

  6. That's really thinking out of the box. Thanks!

  7. card games

    I've been exploring for a bit for any high quality articles or blog posts on this kind of house . Exploring in Yahoo I eventually stumbled upon this site. Studying this info So i'm happy to exhibit that I have an incredibly excellent uncanny feeling I came upon just what I needed. I most unquestionably will make certain to do not fail to remember this web site and give it a glance regularly.

  8. Olga

    This website truly has all of the information and facts I wanted about this subject and didn't know who to ask.

  9. Lucia

    If you have any questions, please contact us.

  10. This post aims to provide you some solid tips.

  11. muser famous

    This is a very good tip especially to those fresh to the blogosphere. Simple but very precise info… Thank you for sharing this one. A must read article!

  12. Enjoy! Highly recommended! Safety gates. Well ventilated too.

  13. vimax zarna

    Why users still use to read news papers when in this technological globe the whole thing is existing on web?

  14. fencing for pets

    Women need to start growing a bit smarter now a days.”

  15. gift idea

    Unquestionably imagine that that you said. Your favorite reason appeared to be at the net the simplest thing to be mindful of. I say to you, I definitely get annoyed whilst other folks think about issues that they just don't know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as outlined out the whole thing with no need side effect , people could take a signal. Will probably be again to get more. Thanks

  16. Easy to install. Functions effectively for my Yorkie.

  17. visit

    I just want to say I'm all new to blogging and site-building and absolutely liked your web blog. Very likely I’m planning to bookmark your blog post . You really come with perfect stories. Thank you for sharing your website.

  18. gems hack

    It?s nearly impossible to find experienced people about this subject, however, you seem like you know what you?re talking about! Thanks

  19. complete installation

    Hi there, You have done an excellent job. I'll definitely digg it and personally suggest to my friends. I am sure they will be benefited from this site.

  20. baby gate on stairs

    I was struggling with this issue as well.

  21. cat hits baby gate

    I spent about an hour installing this gate.

  22. mooc.cau.ac.kr

    DO NOT go to an animal establishment that sells puppies/kittens.

  23. fireplace gates

    The red things on eviction is actually cyan pepper.

  24. Sherrie

    However, the instructions are terrible.

  25. They are making two types of scissors for children.

  26. The biggest issue, to me, is the door release.

  27. stand alone pet gate

    We just recently put a gate at the top of our stairs.

  28. best signup bonus casino

    I've been browsing online more than 3 hours lately, but I by no means found any attention-grabbing article like yours. It's lovely price sufficient for me. In my opinion, if all site owners and bloggers made excellent content as you did, the net can be a lot more helpful than ever before.

  29. Hi there, just wanted to mention, I enjoyed this post. It was funny. Keep on posting!

  30. รับทำ seo

    Usually I don't read article on blogs, but I would like to say that this write-up very compelled me to try and do so! Your writing style has been amazed me. Thanks, quite nice article.

Leave a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.