Free Yourself From that Terrible Breakup | 6 Tips That are Not a “Revenge Body”

Are there more productive ways to snap out of a bad breakup than a revenge body?

Other than the flop of a show on E! With Khloe Kardashian, what is a revenge body?

Urban Dictionary summed it up quite well:

revenge body: when you break up with someone, usually a cheating piece of sh*t who really wasn’t worth your time and you work your ass off to look the best you can just to piss him/her off and make them regret their poor choices.

Can’t wait until he sees this revenge body, he’s going to regret f**king that hoe and losing me.

THE GOOD AND BAD

In theory, it seems like a productive idea to get to the gym, change your eating habits, be mindful, and dress to impress rather than sitting on the couch crying over an F* boy; but when you actually think about it, are you doing it for yourself or JUST to piss off someone who broke your heart and potentially have them want you back?

Is this concept of a revenge body just a ploy to make yourself attractive to others not actually as productive as you may think?

Holding on to an angsty breakup can be pretty damaging. It’s important to keep in mind that you were enough the way you were and no amount of lipstick or exercise will change who you are. Also, we’re willing to bet that who you are is pretty damn cool.

So, instead of doing the whole revenge body thing, here are 5 more productive things to do to snap out of that funk that your ex put you in.

 

Give Yourself Some Time

BE SAD AND EMBRACE IT. Remember that scene from Legally Blonde where she lays in bed and throws chocolate at the tv? Do it. Throw it. But then get up and pick it up, ain’t nobody got time for bugs. It might take a bit to bounce back, and that is fine. Do what feels right, but remember to shower, go to work, and nurture your lasting, healthy relationships (friends, family, etc).

Accept where you are right now

Understand that who you are is amazing. You don’t need to change yourself because you’re not with your significant other anymore. Seriously, you were doing just fine before they came into your life and you will be just fine now. Accept it and stay in the present. If you’re hurting, then hurt, if you feel good, then feel good! No one but you can decide how you should feel. Own your feelings, your current situation, and yourself.

 

Re-Learn Your Body

Don’t get me wrong, sex with another person is great, but guess what is better? Sex with yourself. If you were in a relationship, chances are many of your recent sexual encounters were with that person and not so much with yourself. Now that you’re single, start from the tips of your toes and work your way up. Touch yourself EVERYWHERE. Learn what feels good by yourself. Exploring sexuality and sensuality alone can be very empowering, and so can just being alone in general.

 

Get a Notebook

Go to some chic little book store, and spend 20 minutes picking out the perfect notebook. Lines, no lines, whatever. Just get something with a lot of pages, and maybe some gel pens and/or stickers. Use this book to write down ideas, positive thoughts, little love notes to yourself, create a plan to deal with setbacks and negativity and set boundaries for yourself in future relationships.  

 

Make Time for the Friends

They’ve always had your back, don’t neglect them now. Even if you have zero desire to get out of the house, just do it. Or alternatively, have them come to you. They will make you happy. Express your gratitude to them. Everyone likes to be told they are loved.  Also, while you’re at it, express your gratitude to yourself.

 

If Revenge is Still on Your Mind, Do it Through Your Career

I saw my ex from 10 years ago and he said it’s great to see you is it Miss or Mrs. now? I replied Dr.

If you really think you’ve got something to prove, do it with hard work. Yes, hard work can be done at the gym and if you’re really hell bent on that, just do it. BUT, if you’ve got the time to spare, put all of it towards a goal. Get that promotion, get that degree, get that job, whatever it is… grind until you get it.

 

You are you, and you’re the most important person to YOU. Believe in yourself and be productive after that breakup. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: Self-love is the best kind of love!

 

Sasha

Co- Founder of Psych n Sex, previous writer and campus educator for the Kinsey Institute & published psychology researcher. Manhattan girl obsessed with post ww2 abstract expressionism, beet juice, vintage clothing & Scandinavia.

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